Why I am disappointed with Sunday's Grey's Anatomy

I’ve loved this show since the very beginning. Maybe it’s because it is about people my age learning how to be professionals. Kind of like seminary, but in a different setting and with sex. George is my dream boy. Seriously, and I can see myself and people I know in all of the characters. Even though I’m not a super sexy, super smart chic living and working in a hip place like Seattle, I can still relate to it.

The bomb episodes were the most intense hours of television of my life. I knew it would be hard to hold a candle to those episodes. I kind of wish the writers would have saved them for the season finale, but whatever. I’m still grateful for the great television.

I think I’m pretty self-centered when it comes to movies, television, and books. Sometimes, if I don’t identify with characters, I don’t like the story. Here’s a confession for you. Hold on to your hats. I didn’t like Garden State the first time I saw it. I’ve watched it about seven times now, and obviously it a very special movie- one of my favorites for sure, even before Kyle’s last sermon. My hang up with the first time was that Andrew didn’t feel anything when he lost a parent. Yes, I know he was on all those drugs, but losing my dad was the most horrible experience of my life. How could you not feel something? It just didn’t match what I felt, but in the end that wasn’t important. Eventually, I got to know Large, and I started to understand his story and see his point of view.

I felt the same way about Meredith on Sunday night. She didn’t cry or hug people more. I wanted her to at least have a nightmare or go to therapy. For that matter, why couldn’t she twitch? The West Wing did a great job of showing the post traumatic effects of Zoe’s kidnapping and the shooting of Josh Lyman. I wish Grey’s writers would have done the same. I thought what the writers did with other characters was fine. Meredith just didn’t seem very human to me, but she is the kind of person who buries things. I guess that is a very human response, but I can’t keep hurts in the way she does. I’m sure I’ll be in love with the show again next week. Maybe I’ll even be back at the party on Austin once I get my new car and when my homework slacks off.

A little sunshine...

In Waco, we are all longing for some sunshine. I dont' think we've seen any since the early part of last week. I could be wrong about that because sunshine is one of those things that you don't particularly pay attention to, but you just miss it when it's not there. (It kind of reminds me of the time on Grey's Anatomy when Meredith couldn't remember the last time she kissed McDreamy.)

So this week, I've been trying to find my sunshine in other places. I went to Baylor chapel today to hear Andrew Peterson. He was my favorite Christian artist in college, and I really love his music. I had lunch with him and some friends today, and I promise you he's the nicest guy you will ever meet. Pure sunshine.

You can check out his music at www.andrew-peterson.com. When I heard him in concert for the first time, I seriously cried like a baby. It used to be so rare for me to come across an artist who was a complete stranger yet at the same time spoke words your heart longed to say but could never adequately express. Andrew is definitely one of those people for me. I've been a fan for about seven years now. I've left a lot of the music of my legalistic years behind me, but Andrew will always be hanging around in my cd collection right next to Rich Mullins. Other than Crowder, he's the only Christian artist whose cd's I eagerly anticipate. His music speaks too me and for me (kind of like a certain preacher's sermons that I was privileged to listen to almost every Sunday for two years).

I only cried once this time around, and it was when I heard a song from the latest cd, Far Country. The song is called "Lay Me Down". He said it is a happy song about death. If anybody else said that, I would want to slap them, but I trust Andrew. It is kind of happy. It makes me think about the joy there is in death, and recently I've been bogged down in all my own sorrow. Here are a few of the lyrics:

So when you lay me down to die

I’ll miss my boys, I’ll miss my girls

Lay me down and let me say goodbye to this world

You can lay me anywhere

But just remember this

When you lay me down to die

You lay me down to live

I’ll open up my eyes on the skies I’ve never known

In the place where I belong

And I’ll realize His love is just another word for Home

I believe in the holy shores of uncreated light

I believe there is power in the blood

And all of the death that ever was,

If you set it next to life I believe it would barely fill a cup

Thanks Andy. I hope we always have the opportunity to hear you share your heart through music.

Stirrin' up the Waters of Chapel?

So I get to pray in Truett chapel in the morning. I guess the powers that be finally decided it was okay to let a girl with an accent grace the stage. Yippee!

And coming soon to the Paul Powell chapel....March 7th to be exact....

Steven

Curtis

Chapman!!!!!

Saddle up your horses kids! We're gonna Dance with a Dinosaur! Maybe even burn a few ships and find heaven in the real world!

Thank you for gracing me with a moment to revel in glory of the Christian pop culture from my younger years. That sure was fun.

Keep your fingers crossed. Maybe we'll ask Crowder next.

Wanh-Wannnhaa

Just call me Debbie Downer. Seriously, looking back over the posts of the past few months, I feel like I've become her. You can even make the downer noise when you see me next time.

So Long Sweet Olds

My car died this week. It's not a person, but I am sad. Sad because my Daddy bought me that car, sad because I'm not so sure what I'm going to do, sad because I have to ask people for rides, and mostly sad because I am an adult and I cannot afford to be one.

Tony...Awesome! Mentoring...Not so Great.

Two things to tell you about:

1. Tony Campolo preached yesterday at the Christian Ethics conference at Truett. IT WAS OUT OF THIS WORLD! Seriously folks, I told him it was one of the best sermons I've ever heard. I think it just hit home for most of us seminary folks. I could try to give you a synopsis, but that would just ruin it. I'll just say that he talked about how we should be Kingdom of God minded ministers, and that means being counter-cultural from our capitalist democracy. That was the subject. I ordered it on CD, so if you are nice, I will let you borrow sometime.

2. So, I've pretty much put off the preparations for my summer mentoring as long as I can. I'm going to send out my first feeler e-mail today. I am afraid to death of being told no. I don't know why that word seems so awful, but it just does. I am also afraid that people will feel really bad if they say no to me. And if I tell them I'm a UBCer, will that just make them feel worse when they say no? I don't know. I have two places I want to check into for sure, but I need more ideas.

Here are my criteria. Let me know if you can think of any churches or people who meet this:

1. I would really like to work with a woman who has pastor in her title. (I checked into one possibility, and the website called her the college director and all the men serving in pastoral roles are pastors. Even her male associate was called associate college pastor. That just doesn't fly with me.)
2. If the church is more of the "emerging" persuasion, this is a good thing. I want a place where I feel free to be myself. I realize that these positions aren't all around, and the chances of me actually being paid to do full-time ministry in a place that I will really love and connect with seem so slim right now. I'm discouraged, but I don't want to be.
3. Some of my last conversations with Kyle were about this very topic. He said he thought it would be good for me to have a different cultural experience- I think he meant a place outside the Bible belt. I agree.

Yeah, I know it's a tall order. Ministry positions for women outside the world of children and youth ministry are not incredibly easy to find, nor are ones in churches like mine. Even more terrifying than mentoring is the idea of looking for jobs afterwards. I'll be more specific later, but for now, talking about it makes me so anxious.

So, I'm back from Atlanta. I may tell you about it later, but for now I'm still on the edge from Grey's Anatomy on Sunday night. That was the most intense hour of television I have ever seen. That is one seriously fantastic show. You should become a fan if you are not one already.

Atlanta...Where da Playas Play

We're driving southeast tonight, and I can hardly wait! In 24 hours, I will actually get to experience winter! Although a pseudo version is poking it's head out in Waco this morning, I'll encounter the real thing in Atlanta, Ga this week.

So, we are going to the Current Retreat. Current is the young leaders network for the Cooperative Baptist Fellowship (CBF). I'm excited to see old friends like Sam Davidson and Sparkle (aka Amanda Hambrick), and to meet new ones. I won't be back until Sunday evening, and I hope you will all miss me very much because I will definitely miss you.

More Guys who Remind Me Guys Don't Suck

"Roy" Drew Dabbs- You are my oldest friend in Waco. You make me proud to be from Mississippi. You and your righteous mac and cheese are too precious. I know we will always stay in touch.










Adam- You Hortons just make me smile. Everyone likes y'all, and it's easy to see why. It's so great to have someone like-minded in my classes. I'm glad to be in two circles of friends with you.















Ben- I've said it a million times. You Dudleys are my favorite people in Waco. Sometimes, I wish Matt Bates was older and more my type so I could marry into your family, and we could spend all holidays together. Seriously though, if trials prove your character, you are hands down one of the most amazing people I have ever met. I could not be more proud of you.












Blair- I shed a tear the first time I saw this picture. Sometimes in seminary, we talk about "lay people". We would probably never use such a word at UBC, but when I hear it, I think to myself "Blair Browning is about the best one I know." You are a gem, and I am so glad that you and your family are a part of my church family.








Craig- (In case you don't know, he's the hottie in the middle. Wink. We need more pics of you.) Ever since the first time I saw you pick up a Lake child, I knew you could teach the world a thing or two about love. Your heart is pure gold. As much as you love UBC, I think we love you just as much.





Tom- (we need more pictures of you too.) Could you be any nicer if you tried? I think not. These past few months have sucked, but one of the bright spots has been getting to know you and Beth. I really mean that.





Sam- I appreciate your friendship. I really do. I have loved watching you and Lynnette fall in love and grow and change together. And who would have thought I would have even spoken to you after that summer? You must send me an advanced copy of your book. Looking forward to chillin' with you in Hotlanta.








Chris- My closet blog reader. You gotta love a guy who will only post pictures of himself and celebs on his facebook profile. The Nature Boy sure does have a great tan! Anyways, I enjoy seeing your face around Waco and reminiscing about the sweet home Mississippi. You are a classy dude. You ought to come around more often.

Myles- So, I know were not best friends or anything, but I know you drop by from time to time. You definitely don't make me think guys suck. I'm actually quite fond of you, and I really love this picture. I hope you forgive me for yelling at you at Coco's when you couldn't remember my name. I want to kick myself when I think about that. I was just hurt that someone as cool as you didn't know who I was, but that is in our past. I hope we bump into each other soon!

The more and more I think of you fellas, the more I know that guys don't really suck. People just do sucky things, and females, especially me, aren't exempt from that. Sometimes life happens and death is a part of that. That's not your fault. Sometimes it takes longer than you hoped to meet someone who is right for you. Nobody's fault. From here on out, I hope to remember this list whenever I want to hate on men. Because when you get down to it, I don't hate anything about any of you. When I think about y'all, I know I am not abandoned, but I am loved.

Let me know if I left anyone out. I'm feeling awfully generous with the gush today.